Runnin' through dat wal mart yo
Hey, Amanda here. So after i made my
"proposition" to my mens, we were about to go out for
some tour bus lovin when....
Lance: hey guys... uh come here for a minute!
*those two dumb asses come with him a few feet away from me! thanks to my supersonic ears i heard the whole convo*
Lance: listen guys.... you both get more ass than a toilet seat... me, well i think she's my only fan so....
Justin: what are u tryin' to say foo? dat hunny wants some of dis' foine ass an imunna give it to her!
JC: yeah, what the hell should i do until i get some more cocaine... uh i mean caffiene? why not hammer a chick right J-dawg
*both start doing the "hells yeah whatsup!" guy thing when they agree*
lance: NO!!! LEAVE HER ALONE!
justin: or what is yo punk ass gonna do beatch?
lance: I'M GONNA KICK YOUR EBONICS SPEAKING ASS!!!
*lance has some temper problems so the guys give in and the guys head out to the bus.. alone... lance walks back over to me*
lance: *sweetly* okay... you stay here for a few minutes... i'll go check to make sure no gay asses like joey are in the bus okay?
amanda: sure what the hell
lance: just come on out in like 10 minutes... *lance walks away*
yeah so after 2 diet cokes and a snickers i'm ready for my good lance lovin..
too bad the other nsyncers had other ideas
CAN I VISIT YOU BETWEEN EASTER
AND LABOR DAY?
I started walking out of wal mart when those gay
asses joey and get this STEVE (suprise, suprise... steve
following joey around) see me. Joey remembers something about me,
him and a video *although his memory is shady cuz' he just had
two boxes of twinkies and a pie in isle 4* so the dorks stop me.
joey: hey sweet thang
amanda: oh, f*ck its you two again
joey: yeah baby... now i remember.. so hows about that movie
amanda: f*ck no you dumb ass
joey: oohh sassy, i like it rarrh
amanda: go away... dammit!
joey: my name isn't fred flintstone... but i can make your bed rock
amanda: um... no because i'd never let a skeez like you anywhere near my bed
steve: (he speaks!) so uh.. if your arm is labor day and your hair is easter can i visit you between easter and labor day?
joey and amanda: WTF? YOU'RE SUCH A DORK!
joey: see baby, we think alike
amanda: no you dumb ass, we just both know your brother is a fag
joey: yeah he is pretty gay
steve: hey! i can get chicks on my own! i don't need you joey!
joey: what the hell? whos gonna video tape me and my teenyboppers now? no steve come back!
steve: i guess you are right.... i'll get no ass without you big joe!
joey: yeah i know, anyways how bout' you and me babe
amanda: okay... you try to follow me hoe-y okay?
joey: yeah.. sure i'll follow you
amanda: no listen.... you are a queer ass std carrying piece of crap and i think you are a dumb ass.... your brother is a total moron just like you and you both should just go f*ck each other
joey: so are you saying that you don't wanna ride big joe...
amanda: yes... now are you catching on
steve: did it hurt when you fell cuz' you've been running all day
amanda: oh my god... hey hoey and company.... a twinkie! *i grab a box of twinkies from the shelf*
joey and steve: ohhhh.... twinkies
amanda: go get them! *throwing them in the air... as far as they would go*
* joey and steve ran off to get the twinkies and thank god i narrowly escaped that gay ass parade..... off to the bus - o -love*
Hey my name is chris... i have a clothing line... wanna model?
so i got away from joey and steve..... but then
guess who i ran into? Mr.fumanskeeto himself.... old man chris.
Will i ever get some lance lovin?
chris: hey there little lady
amanda: oh my god... hi chris how are you
chris: good good.... hahaha busta bust!!
amanda: wtf are you on?
chris: i'm high on you baby!
amanda: why do you have to be a dumb f*ck too?
chris: i'm not a dumb f*ck! i have a clothing line... you may of heard of me... chris kirkpatrick of fumanskeeto....
amanda: actually... no i haven't heard of your gay ass clothes
chris: ohhh..... k.. well we are new.... but anyways i'm looking for some fly hunnys to model and you look about right....
amanda: oh god....
chris: not oh god.... oh chris... remember that cuz' you'll be calling it...
amanda: yeah... i know all night long... sure right.. anyway i was just leaving
chris; wait baby don't go... i got a cute dog wanna see
amanda: actually no....
chris: *proudly* say hiiiiiiiiiii busta.... he could model with you!
amanda: no actually thats okay... i really have to go because
chris: because i'm old..... or because i don't speak ebonics! or do crack? or eat like a pregnant cow? god.... i just... i can't compete!! I'm getting old.... oh god..... *starts sobbing like a 5 year old girl*
amanda: oh... i'm sorry.... (i actually felt bad for old man skeez... i mean he isnt a total moron like joey so I took a step closer and was actually going to touch his icky ass)
chris: so you wanna go bang?
amanda: oh my god.... i'm leaving now goodbye!
chris: wait! come back!
amanda: no!! *as i scream and run away*
chris: well i always can have some fine lovin' with you busta.... come on...
I'm not on crack... really
So I got away from hoey and his tail... and
geezer chris! I finally make my way out to the tour bus where I
see jc sitting at the table near the door. I really just wanna
find lance... but he stops me..
jc: hey amanda *sniff*
amanda: how'd you know my name..... weird
jc: uh... lance told me.... uh... he's not ready he said to wait wit me
amanda: uh sure.. right
jc: so baby on the real.... *i know this isn't EXACTLY how the song goes... but i'm changing it*
amanda: oh god
jc: are ya feelin' my timbs,*sniff* my baggy jeans... my THUG appeal?
amanda: no... by the way.. what thug appeal? you're a white boy.. you were on the f*cking mickey mouse club!
jc: do ya like it *sniff* when a man can keep it real?
amanda: so where is jerome?
jc: what? howd you know about jerome?*sniff*
amanda: i have my sources..... lets talk about your problem...
*5 minutes later, jc is crying into my shoulder.... not such a bad thing.. to have a hot nsyncer hanging on you..... think lancey thoughts amanda... lancey thoughts*
amanda: anyways... i'm sorry about your problem... but I really do have to go
jc: oh... yeah... lance.... anyways... sorry he didn't really tell you to stay here
amanda: yeah i figured that.. i'll come find ya later we can talk some more okay?
jc: *drying his eyes* yeah sure *sniff*
amanda: stay off the crack okay?
jc: *sniff* sure...
Well that was strange.... i'm not a counceler but jc's drug problem made me kinda sad.... what could cheer me up? some fine lance ass.... so i made my way towards the back of the bus when wo do i run into.... j-dawg in person
big bro j-love: mah benz is one tight mo fo
I was trying to find lance when i ran into
justin.... he was sitting up in his bunk when he saw me.... he
got my attention and told me the same weak ass story about
"lance said you should chill wit me" story jc did. well
seeing as how i had a few more minutes to kill (ten minutes is a
LONG time) i decided to humor juju
justin: hey grrlll.... whatsupwitdat?
justin: you ain't chilln' with lance.... i knew that foo was battin' for da otha team ifyaknowwhatimsayin! homeslice
amanda: why the hell do you talk like that?
justin: like what?
amanda: like some boyz in the hood, extra reject?
justin: grrlll ya bee trippen yo!
amanda: oh well
justin: so how bout' climbing on up here and let justy get thrusty on your FOINE ass!
amanda: ahahahahaha ..... ahahaha sorry... that was really funny
justin: *points* if dat leg is...
amanda: oh shit... here we go
justin: is thanksgiving... and dat is christmas.... can i visit ya between holidays yaknowwhatimsayin?
amanda: no.... no holiday lovin' for you; but mad props for gettting it right..unlike some people
justin: dayum woman.... no one has ever turned the thrusty AND the holiday line down!
amanda: maybe cuz' you've only tried it on ten year olds and hoes
justin: true dat, true dat
amanda: well.... when ahm done hitting lance.... i'll come up there and see your thrusting for mah self yo *omg... i'm talking like him and i just told him i'd bang him! lancey filled thoughts..... lancey filled thoughts*
justin: dayum girl.... i'll be waitin!
okay... if you were on a search for your favorite nsyncer to get some dayum good lovin and you were "propostitoned" by every OTHER member.... chances are you wouldn't have made it this far without some action right? right? true dat yo!
finally the time has come..... i passed all the nsyncer's come ons and now its time to find my lovely little lansten!!!!!!!
* Hold the lovin train up for one damn minute, what do YOU think happened? Well here's my attempt at a weak ass contest! hehe see baby here's the deal, would it be too foward if I.. wait hold on, not that. But all you do is email us what you think happened/should happen when I finally get to the back with poofoo; good, bad or ugly... whatever. So write up an ending, email it and you'll get a tight ass prize*
note: the prize will probably be a picture of you and your favorite nsyncer that me or Alex can make or a wav of the THUG APPEAL part in "bring it all to me" or some pictures I'll scan out of Just Justin for you.. but nothing from a store or something that will be mailed to your house! just so you know